Midterm week is among (most of) us! By this time we’ve settled into the routine of trying to balance class with your job and internship and still have time to get hammered on the weekend and maybe solve world hunger while you’re at it. Just kidding about the last part, but it really is the most stressful part of the semester. For me, the most important lesson college has taught me is to pay attention in class and ask when you need help. Unfortunately, the class I have the hardest time in is plagued with the most irritating people imaginable. While discussing this with my close girlfriend, and fellow SEV writer Jasmine, we’ve found that there seems to be very similar types of undesirables in class. Most of you might be able to relate (unless this is you….which is awkward).
1. The Talking Answer Key
The title is pretty self-explanitory. The TAK is the one student in class who has to let everyone know that they’ve finished a problem and have to let everyone know what the answer is before the teacher goes over it. There is nothing more frustrating than trying to solve a problem or find an answer, work through 2/3 of the problem, and to hear “X= 3″ instead of keeping quiet until the teacher actually asks for the answer. Even worse is when the TAK is completely wrong. Maybe it’s because I’ve gone to private school most of my life and calling out wasn’t a thing, but I assume people who do this were just raised in a barn with no concept of manners.
2. Yung Socrates
You’ll know who this person is because they most likely love to argue with your professor over petty and dumb topics. This is the guy/girl who has a “controversial” opinion on everything. Usually a philosophy or psych major, this type of person believes that after one semester of their intro class they are suddenly more experienced and knowledgable than everyone else. Tends to result in them spreading wrong information. This stereotype is better explained in this scene from Clueless
3. The Malfoys
Harry Potter fans represent! The Malfoy is the usually white, arrogant, and potentially good looking guy in your class who acts like he owns the place. He’ll usually show up late or with a crew of his friends and almost always sits in the back of the classroom. Essentially a 12 year old girl stuck in a adult male body, this is the type of guy who will not be loudly disrespectful, but mutter things under his breath as soon as the professor turns his back. He’ll pick fights with the professor when he doesn’t get attention and get defensive when faced with any discipline action threanted to him. “I didn’t even do anything, bro!” But he’s not shaking in his backwards snapback, he’ll be okay cause his dad “has connections and stuff”. Possibly my least favorite person in class
4. The Classroom Casanova
He made eye contact with you the first day of class and probably checked you out while you weren’t looking. Similar to the “Where my hug at?” guy, he is out to find true love and believes it to be in his college classroom. He shows up in your inbox at 1am monday night with a “what r u doing?” text. He probably listens to Drake and wants your advice on all his girl problens. But hold up! You’re not the only one hes doing this to. He’s hooking up with a girl from his english class, and going out with lab partner in bio. This person strives to be the Van Wilder, and will probably end up irrelevant and undesirable by the spring semester.
5. The Human Boombox
In high school I always assumed that upon graduating and getting a job this type of person would purchase a pair of headphones and grow up. I was dead wrong because we still have an abundance of people who play music off their phones. When I walk into a class before an exam I most definitley don’t want to hear Fetty Wap’s autotuned whining being played out loud. The same goes for when I’m in the cafeteria trying to eat before class. Maybe I should start a charity that gives free headphones to these types of people.